Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
