The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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