areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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