somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
