I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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