doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
