Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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