Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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