You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
