He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
