I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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