I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
do nipples grow back?
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