This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
