i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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