So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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