I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
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