just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
