Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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