you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
