Who did Billy Mays play for?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
