Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
