I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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