my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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