so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
this will be a night to untag.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
