if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
