I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize