Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
