Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Be still, my beating vagina.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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