Me. At least after what I've been through.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize