I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
