my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
