When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
