i don't like sucking hair
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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