Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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