So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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