the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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