I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
