i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize