I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I just pynch a tree in the face
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
