Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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