she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize