is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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