Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Woke up backwards on a recliner
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
