im drinking this country out of the recession.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize