I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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