No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
