if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
