You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
