Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize