I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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