How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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